Our Last Meeting
"This is our reality. We shouldn't have to explain or justify it, and we've finally stopped trying. Which is perhaps why I was walking through Middlesbrough town centre on Saturday, accompanied by a bunch of freaks in shorts, wigs, hats, face (and beard) paint and t-shirts, playing kazoos and carrying Winnie the Pooh balloons. There were a few sarcastic comments...mostly, though, we were greeted with looks of comical bemusement.

'Hang on, aren't you supposed to be miserable?'"

Most Relevant Aspect of Babycare
The kitchen when she cries for her feed at 4 in the morning. A bloody long way.

Going down instead of us because:
Local hero takes over as manager. Can't fail. What is Trevor Francis doing these days?

BSaD Verdict
An entertaining by-product of our success last season has been an increase in the number of clubs willing to gamble on an unproven manager. This is likely to result in a considerable number of unsightly messes, particularly back in the Championship where too many have missed the critical detail - not that we'd appointed an untried manager in general, but Betty in particular. There are those you'd wish an ugly end to ahead of Watford-born Gareth Southgate, but I must confess to having doubts; if the new boss's ultra-cautious stage direction during the World Cup are anything to go by a Boro side that might struggle for goals anyway will do well to cross the halfway line too often. Very bottom half.