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BLIND, STUPID AND DESPERATE
 
Thing of the week:
Giant Smarties
By Ian Grant
 
F***in' ace, mate! Every so often those corporate asswipes who spend so much of their time finding ways to make us part with money we haven't really got for things we don't really want come up with an idea so staggeringly perfect that the only possible response is a slap of the forehead and a triumphant punch of the air.

Giant Smarties, then. They're Smarties...but they're big. As someone who's eaten enough of the trad variety to collect the whole alphabet on the lids (I was an English student - it was an educational aid), this is quite clearly a moment of great significance.

Some people who don't know any better have commented that Giant Smarties just taste like Minstrels. Which is, of course, completely missing the point - Minstrels are brown, Minstrels are boring.

So next time you've got 20p to spare and fancy bribing your favourite BSaD editor to rig the next 'Player of the Month' vote, you know what to do. But, if you want Steve Talboys to win, you might need a bit more than 20p's worth of Smarties...