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BLIND, STUPID AND DESPERATE
 
Editorials:
Tolkein / Watford crossover
By Matt Rowson
 
One of the world's great mysteries... that there has never been a big-screen adaptation of Tolkein's classic "The Lord of the Rings". Until now, that is... and somewhat surprisingly, some familiar faces have been cast in key roles.

Aragorn, the long lost King of Gondor whose victorious reclaiming of the throne is detailed in the third episode, "The Return of the King", will be played by Graham Taylor.

Gandalf, the wise old wizard, will be played by Tom Walley.

Of the hobbits, Frodo, the hero and central character of the story who bears the great weight across the whole of Middle Earth, will be played by Richard Johnson.

Sam Gamgee, reliable sidekick to Frodo, is played by Micah Hyde.

The impetuous young Pippin is played by Wayne Andrews.

Merry, whose role is almost incidental for the most part until some spectacular feats in the battle of the Pelenor fields (Luton at home last season), is played by Darren Bazeley.

...and Bilbo, the old hobbit who's seen all this before, is played by Luther Blissett (understudied by Kenny Jackett).

Of the remainder of the Fellowship of the Ring, Gimli the dwarf, stout and useful with an axe, is played by Nigel Gibbs, not a bad chopper himself. Legolas, the elegant elf with remarkable vision, is played by Gifton Noel-Williams. Boromir, heir of the steward of Gondor who is betrayed by greed, is played by Bruce Dyer. His father, Denathor the steward of Gondor whose pride and arrogance canít cope with the failure of his city, sending him insane, is played by Chris Waddle.

Of the enemies of the fellowship, the dark Lord Sauron in played by Lennie Lawrence. The Nazgul are played by the Luton defence and midfield, with Mitchell Thomas starring as the Morgul King, The Lord of the Nazgul.

Saruman, the wizard who is corrupted by greed and the desire for power, is played by Andy Hessenthaler. His snivelling servant Greamer is played by Lee Nogan.

Completing the cast, the slimy, hollow-eyed wretch Gollum is played by Gary Bennett.

Look out for this Masterpiece in a cinema near you soon. Possibly.