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Johnny's Watford story
By Matt Bunner
One summer's DAY in Torquay, little Johnny was bored. He asked his mum what he could do. She replied that he should PLUCK the first idea that comes out of his head. Johnny thought that this was the WRIGHT idea and told his mum how SMART he thought she was. He remarked that she's too clever to be a TAYLOR. She should turn the PAGE and do something else. She replied that she's been through the MILLEN with the divorce and her finances are taking a HYDEing. Johnny brushed his teeth with GIBBS-SR and felt to cheer his mum up he would buy her a GIFTON for her birthday.

"She loves US history", he thought. Johnny went down to the WILLIAMS bookstore and asked the assistant if she had any books on JOHNSON or KENNEDY. "Sorry, none at TAL, BOT we do have a BARNES-storming book on CALLAGHAN, telling about his life of REILLY, or what about JENKINS? Or how about that CONNOLLY chap?". "No, sorry he's fat and greedy now", replied Johnny.

Johnny was stumped. "I could get the PHILLIPS screwdriver she's always wanted, but I'm sure TERRY will get her that. What about a BOLTON shelf for the kitchen? Maybe a ROSTRON for the theatre group? SHERWOODn't object, surely?". He then COTONed on to an idea. "If I go down to LES the TAYLORs, past the old MILLER house with the CHAMBERLAIN and the Rank NGONGE, I'll be able to purchase a hand-made ladies JACKETT. However, I might look a right CHARLERY carrying it back!", he chuckled. Johnny did this and was impressed to get change pressed into the PALMER of his hand. "Excellent PRICE!", he cried. He only had a FURLONG to walk back to his mum's place, so he set off a BLISSETTing pace.

There's no MORALEE to this story. Sorry to RAMAGE on....