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BLIND, STUPID AND DESPERATE
 
04/05: Reports:

Football League Cup Quarter Final, 30/11/04, 7.45pm
Watford
versus
Portsmouth
 
Who?
By Dominic Ray

"So, who's your choice then?" said the slightly inebriated pompey fan who'd latched on to us as we wandered to the Vic.
"Eh?"
"Who's your choice? Who do you reckon will be a threat to us?"
"Well, we're a bit depleted in the striking department. Our pacier players are out injured."
"We've got one of the best defences in the league. Quality."
"Like I said, we don't really have the strikers to run at you with pace."
"Our defence is quick. Very good on the deck."
"Oh, well, in that case you'd better watch out for H."
"Who?"
"H. Heidar. Helguson. You must have heard of him..."
"Who?"
"He's our legend. A totally mad Icelandic forward who will put his body anywhere, and would run through a brick wall for us."
"Oh, right. We're gonna miss Yakuba. Best striker in the premiership. He would have torn you apart."
"Ho hum. I reckon it'll be 1-1 and go to penalties. Maybe you should put a bet on it."
"No way. I've done my bet. 3-0."
(Grinning) "To Watford?"
"No. To us."

Don't you just love conversations like that...

Dedicated to Adam, who made it this time, and my grandad, who didn't. Rest in peace.